The Way

Hey guys.

I'm really sorry about the lack of updates. It's just been a really busy time for me, and I haven't been able to muster up the manliness to throw down some awesome on these hallowed pages.

Ooopsie. I slipped and accidentally took off all of my clothes. Teehee.

Lets see here... What did I do this week? I went to ROTLAN, which was a blast, even if the poeple there weren't all as fun as they were last year. Some memorable moments include: Me beating down Eric at GHIII; Tom, Jade, and I shouting out random things while playing Halo. "IS THIS TETRIS?!?! I LOVE TETRIS! HOW DO YOU LEVEL UP IN TETRIS? GUYS, I WANT TO CAST MY KA-MAY-O-MAY-O WAVE, WHAT'S THE BUTTON COMBO?" Win. Massive teabagging on Schneider was also amazing. I love you guys so much.I've been spending a lot of time on Guitar Hero lately. My dream has finally been achieved. I was playing today and suddenly it just clicked. I hauled Raining Blood, (Didn't even need the Starpower) and then almost beat One. It's just a matter of time, I've almost got it down, I just have to get more endurance. (One/two tries at the max. That song make me so tired...) I played against this one dude, and I got beat at Dover. He got 257,000. What a beast. (I friended him.)

I've also been spending a lot of time with Jenny lately. I'm sorry to see her go to New York. Who will I lock face with now?!?!? Not Shane! That much is for sure.

Speaking of Shane, he wore a dress today. He was so pretty. I helped him present his report, but it was a little racy. (Read: Not full points) I wish that I had a camera, so that I could take some sexy pictures. Grrrrowwl.Hmmm... What else went down? I'm still working out with Tucker, and we are getting MEGA BUFF. YEAH! SEXY!

Oh, right. It's still NO-SHEMBER you guys, so make sure that you don't shave. That would suck.

I found the name of a song today that has eluded me for years. It's called "The Way" and it's by Fastball. Lyrics below:

They made up their minds
And they started packing
They left before the sun came up that day
An exit to eternal summer slacking
But where were they going without ever knowing the way?
They drank up the wine
And they got to talking
They now had more important things to say
And when the car broke down they started walking
Where were they going without ever knowing the way?

Chorus:

Anyone could see the road that they walk on is paved in gold
And its always summer, they'll never get cold
They'll never get hungry
They'll never get old and gray
You can see their shadows wandering off somewhere
They wont make it home
But they really don't care
They wanted the highway
They're happy there today , today

The children woke up
And they couldn't find em
They left before the sun came up that day
They just drove off
And left it all behind em
But where were they going without ever knowing the way?

Anyone could see the road that they walk on is paved in gold
And its always summer, they'll never get cold
They'll never get hungry
They'll never get old and gray
You can see their shadows wandering off somewhere
They wont make it home
But they really don't care
They wanted the highway
They're happy there today , today (repeat)

Thanksgiving Break, HERE I COME!

Pie et. all

This blog post is a bit late. I'm writing it the following day. Pretend that it's on Thursday, because that's what I will be discussing. I would have done one last night, but I got home at 2 in the morning and my mom was PISSED. (And slightly inebriated I think.)

That being said, let's get to the meat of things. Last night was Pie-night. We didn't have all of the usual crowd there, as Tucker had lost his phone and Shane was being a Ho. To compensate, however, we had Sarah, some of Jenny's friends, Brandon, and Stacy. (Tucker and Shane showed up for a little while, but they really didn't do anything.) There was PIE. And whipped cream: lot's of it. We watched one of my favorite movies and then another one. Many jokes were swapped and good times were had by all.

Soon, it was just Pookie and Sam; Jenny and me. We were cuddling our respective partners. (Read: Chaperoned by a cat.) Occasionally, there would be "hand-checks" or Jenny and I would sit up and stare at Pookie and Sam until they were completely uncomfortable. Then, after a long time, the other two had to leave. Then, it was just Jenny and me. >_>

I bought an awesome tie last night too. It cost about 9 dollars and it is my favorite color of red. (Maroon-ish) Totally worth it.

I may be the only person I know, besides Brandon, who truly enjoys the flavor of cinnamon gum. I ask people if they want some gum, and they say, "OK!" But when I reveal that the gum is cinnamon, they suddenly don't want any. Lame.

ROTLAN is tonight. I'm psyched. I should have a write-up tomorrow. Godspeed.

Tired.

AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! Biology!

Step one: Remove lid.

It seems like I have less time to do the things I enjoy, even though I really have more. I can't spend any time on the computer. I don't have time to read. I don't have time to test out my shoes with real Parkour. I don't have time to visit Jenny. It's like, my life is contracting.

I spent a lot of time on the phone with Jenny tonight. Maybe like two hours. But, that's not really how I want our relationship to be. I'm not... good at talking to people on the phone. I hate it. Just like leaving messages. I'm not funny, I'm not cool, and I don't HAVE FUN. I don't want to be like Steven. He's a pussy-whipped woman. I AM NOT!

Two Hours a Day Keeps the Psycho Away.

Hey guys. It's down to the rule of the mother. She says, "Hey Bitch, get it out of your head that I ain't crazy. I'm gonna learn you one! I'll assume you've been using the computer for too long no matter what, and I won't let you do anything. Also, to make sure that you can't full any funny business, I'm going to stay home from work and complain. Too bad your dad isn't around anymore, because although I am fully capable of taking you to school, I'd much rather see you walk."

So, I write this post as fast as I physically can, while she is out of earshot and out of the room. Hmmm. This could be how it is for a while. I hope not.

In other news, I got my new shoes today. They are epic. Massively epic. I love the way the colors look, and I love the way that they feel even more. They are so light, flexible, and have such good traction that it puts my ratty old Vans to shame. Heh.

I should be roughly 1.3 times better at Parkour now. For sure.

Lastly, but definitely not least, let me talk about Jenny. I feel like I have been neglecting her. She is so nice and funny, and I don't ever talk about her in this blog, nor do I spend nearly enough time with her. I suppose it could partially be some inner selfishness, the desire to cling to that loner path that I have been on for the entirety of my life. (Contrary to popular belief, I am very self sufficient. I could go weeks without seeing people and not feel lonely.)

I really like her. A lot. I've told her that, and I'm pretty sure that she feels the same way. Something about it just feels... Right. When we're together, I'm happy. People talk about how odd our relationship is. Actually, it seems that most people are weirded out by it. I don't understand that. Is everyone else really that superficial? It's like I'm the only person who understands that there is more to a girl, and most certainly a relationship, than an incredible body. (Not that Jenny doesn't look nice. I think she's very pretty in her own way.) Inner beauty > Outer Beauty. Hands down. No contest.

If there's one thing I am sick of, it's people asking me how far I've gone with Jenny. I've gone as far as I need to go at my speed. Although I may say that I'm a one-base guy, I really am a classical romancer. Good things take time. It's hard to fuck things up going slow, but it's pretty damn easy to do it by going too fast. (Therefore, I always respond to their questions with a ridiculous story about insane sex-exploits. Sexploits?)

Keep it real.

What will I do with my freetime now?

Well, it's over. The play is finally over. Dear god. I messed up pretty bad on Friday, but people said that I redeemed myself in the later shows. Stupid Gin Rummy.

What will I do with the free time I now have? Before, play practice used to eat up 10+ hours a week. I would work out, visit Jenny, go to practice and the go home and go to sleep. I would get my homework done IF I WAS LUCKY. Now, who knows? I'll probably just end up robotron-ing more. (Kudos to you if you know what that means!) [Hint: It involves robot noises]

Hmm... Does it matter what I do? I still won't get my homework done at a reasonable time and I will still need some McLovin' on a daily basis. How many times did I use THAT phrase in the past few days? Wow. I must be tired on more than one level.

Secretly, intimately, I fear I may be having an affair with my computer. I've spent a lot of time with it lately, and Guitar Hero may be getting jealous. I'm making a note here: Give my X-Box some McLovin'. There, I should be good for now.

Portals' ending song perfectly sums up my feelings:

This was a triumph
I’m making a note here: huge success
It’s hard to overstate my satisfaction
Aperture Science
We do what we must because we can
For the good of all of us
Except the ones who are dead
But there’s no sense crying over every mistake
You just keep on trying till you run out of cake
And the science gets done and you make a neat gun
For the people who are still alive

I’m not even angry
I’m being so sincere right now
Even though you broke my heart and killed me
And tore me to pieces
And threw every piece into a fire
As they burned it hurt because
I was so happy for you
Now these points of data make a beautiful line
And we’re out of beta, we’re releasing on time
So I’m glad I got burned, think of all the things we learned
For the people who are still alive

Go ahead and leave me
I think I’d prefer to stay inside
Maybe you’ll find someone else to help you
Maybe Black Mesa
That was a joke, ha ha, fat chance
Anyway this cake is great
It’s so delicious and moist
Look at me still talking when there’s science to do
When I look out there it makes me glad I’m not you
I’ve experiments to run, there is research to be done
On the people who are still alive

And believe me I am still alive
I’m doing science and I’m still alive
I feel fantastic and I’m still alive
And while you’re dying I’ll be still alive
And when you’re dead I will be still alive
Still alive
Still alive

Grotugh.

Hey. I'm grounded until Saturday. No blog posts until then. -_-

Salmon in Love

Now, try to imagine this, if you will:

You are in a dark room. The room is warm, seductive, and intimate. It makes you think thoughts that you have never expressed for rooms before. You begin to plan out elaborate scenarios in which you turn on the lights and find all of the wonders laying about. However, when the illumination finally comes, you are drawn to one facet of the room upon which you had previously been unaware: The ugliest nightstand you have ever seen. Not only is it disgusting to look at, but it is possessed. That's like three shades of bad right there folks. Would you turn the lights off and try to go back to the way things were, or would you accept the nightstand?


People ask me, about 5 or 6 times a month, if I'm going to be a comedian when I grow up. Hmm. Good one, because I really have no idea. I don't know if I would be capable of competing with the hilarious men out there and coming out with new material every show. Probably not. Also, how much money is there in being a comedian if you aren't one of the huge names? Not much.

A better answer would be: Hey, do I come over to your house at night and ask you what you want to be when you graduate? NO. Just figure that I'll do something that will make me money and allow me to pursue my dream of one day becoming a ninja. Everyone knows that ninjas are sex-demons.

Recently I started working out with Tucker and Jimmy. We're pretty serious about it, and we're going all out. Hardcore. Pedal to the M-F---ing metal. >_>

That's about it for now. I need to get some sleep so I'm not dead by tomorrow.

Keep on keeping on.

What makes one a Guitar Hero? Is it the ability to shamelessly play with such fury and passion that you drop the mouth of anyone watching? Is it just the ability to beat the game on Expert? Perhaps, it's just being better than your friends.

Bullshit.

A Guitar Hero is the dude who gets all of the achievements.

You better believe it's going to happen. I've already got one of the two hardest achievements in the game. [Meet Your Maker] I played this guy today on Live, and he was REALLY good. I can five-star Cliffs of Dover on expert, and this was one of my better runs, (230,000) and I just barely scraped a win. INTENSE. Now, it's down to the easy achievements. All of them are possible, even beating the Dragonforce song. I'm sure of it.

Also I've got a lot of love coming in at you guys. Mucho love.

How many sardines can you fit in your mouth without seeming like a pig?

Hey.

How's it going you guys? Yeah, the ones of you who are actually taking the time aside to read this. I hope it's going about as good as that time I got rugburn. (Interpret that as you will. >_>)

That being aside, let me introduce you to my new blog. It should be like my old page on Shane's website, except updated more regularly. I hope I can figure out how to work all this stuff... I think it will be an enjoyable endeavor.

So. Let the good times roll!